Imagine giving a gift, something very precious which you have taken painstaking effort to prepare for the one you love so much. You’ve taken time, money and energy to plan the specific moment you will present your gift. AND THEN, the unthinkable happens—the gift is rejected. The answer is NO. The reality dawns on you. This person whom I love so much is not interested in me or my gift.
I wonder how God feels? He sent His precious Son to carry our burdens, to take away our sins, to be beaten for our diseases. The chastisement of our peace was upon Him. This amazing substitution is God’s gracious and loving gift for us. It cannot be earned. It is a free gift! Yet multitudes still reject His love!
Today, I encourage you to remember what Jesus has done for you! Receive this free gift! Simply dare to believe that He died for you and that He rose from the dead. You will never be the same!
Joshua Blayhi says he had an encounter similar to the biblical account of Saul on the road to Damascus, where a bright light appeared and Jesus spoke, telling Blayhi to stop killing or he would die. Saul of Tarsus, who became Apostle Paul, was a persecutor of Christians and orchestrated the stoning of the first recorded Christian martyr, Stephen.
How could this be? How could these men break free of the desire to murder over and over again? How could their hearts and imaginations be so totally changed? The Apostle Paul would later state in the scriptures that we have all sinned, falling short of God’s glory. Certainly, not all are killers—but all are sinners. In the accounts of these two men we find the death of a sinner…but we also see the resurrection of a saint!
Becoming truly free not only required God’s forgiveness, but both Saul and Joshua Blayhi had to forgive themselves. Self-forgiveness is often a bitter pill to swallow. Although God’s grace had forgiven both, each daily faced the effects of their sin.
Neither Paul nor Joshua demonstrates any fear in declaring the good news. One man lived 2,000 years ago, the other lives today, but the same truth delivered both men and gave them strength to face their sin and devote themselves to helping people—and, in Joshua’s case, to seek restitution! Paul said to the church at Rome, “I am not ashamed of the gospel (good news), for it is the power of God for salvation to everyone who believes!”
Today, Jesus offers you freedom from your past and hope for your future! You can be forgiven and you can forgive yourself!
How many evils committed could disqualify you from God’s mercy? How many murders would be unforgivable and banish you to eternal suffering? Joshua Blahyi, a former Liberian warlord, knows something about God’s grace. Raised to be a tribal priest, he began conducting weekly human sacrifices at age 11. As an adult, he became one of the most feared warlords of Africa. After giving his life to Christ in 1996, and beginning his ministry in 1999, Blahyi renounced his violent past and confessed to murdering nearly 20,000 people during Liberia’s 14-year civil war.
Still feared by many, he was the subject of a PBS documentary. Curious about this radical conversion, the filmmakers followed Blahyi for 5 years as he sought forgiveness from those he had harmed.
Though the consequences were unknown, Blahyi agreed to admit his crimes before Liberia’s Truth and Reconciliation Commission. According to The Christian Post, he says, “I went to the TRC because I wanted to reconcile with my country and free my conscience.” Fortunately, the commission recommended amnesty.
How could a person change so dramatically? How could one’s conscience be cleansed from such horrific actions?
Forgiveness has both a horizontal and a vertical aspect. Horizontal forgiveness releases us from judgments that bind us to unhealthy relationships. It is the gatekeeper to the unforgiving spirit. As long as we are alive, we will encounter hurt and disappointment. What we do with this disappointment will determine our future.
Vertical forgiveness begins at the heart of God and extends directly to our hearts. It is a supernatural force of divine love that has the power to lift every burden. God’s forgiveness can lift our perspective of our relationships and ourselves. It can cause us to rise above every offense and see things from a heavenly perspective.
Are you troubled in spirit? Right now reach out for God’s divine forgiveness and discover a new liberty and freedom in Him! You can be free, happy and loosed from the chains of an unforgiving spirit!
As a young person, I faced relentless teasing for my size, name and abilities. No one seemed to understand, not even my mother. I remember her saying to me, “Leslie you are beautiful and gifted, what are you so upset about? Straighten up!” Those words, although intended to bring peace, only drove my shame deeper and placed an unseen wedge in my heart.
Several years later I realized that whenever I was in my mother’s house, we would automatically disagree and sometimes argue. There was no one else in the world I loved more at that time and yet we could not dwell in peace. I wanted help. My friend suggested that I ask God to forgive me for judging my mother and, if possible, seek my mother’s forgiveness. When I asked my mother to forgive me for not being the daughter I should have been, I remember her response. She said, “Leslie, you’re my daughter. Forgive you for what? I love you!”
My mother had no memory of any wrong, which is often the case, and the reason we must learn to guard our hearts. Because as the Proverb says, the issues of life flow out of the heart. My release did not come in knowing that my mother understood. My release came when I understood I was forgiven by God and I had forgiven both my mother and myself.
Have you ever considered the dominant role an unforgiving spirit can play in your life? You might wonder, what is an unforgiving spirit?
Virginia Whitman relates an incident that occurred several years ago at Fairfax Airport in Kansas City, where workers were constructing a proposed electrically ‘perfect’ room. This room was designed to provide technicians a work environment free of any electrical interference. To make this possible, special construction techniques were employed. When the job was complete, however, a special electronic “reading” revealed a small amount of electrical conduction. After hours of searching, testing, and measuring, the trouble was discovered. The culprit was the lead pencil marks on the lumber used by the carpenters.
What is an unforgiving spirit? It is the unseen pencil mark on the soul, breaking our connections with other people and affecting all of our relationships. Initially difficult to identify, an unforgiving spirit is developed over time, due to an inability to deal properly with shame, offenses, and even a pain suffered.
Is there a door to the heart that is the source of an unforgiving spirit? The seeds of an unforgiving spirit are planted when we are wronged in some way. Often, the first hurt we experience may begin as a child; unknowingly inflicted by those we love the most.
Here are my first two tips to help you evaluate your behavior patterns and begin taking control of your thoughts and attitudes:
#1 – Don’t Play the Blame Game. I learned long ago that if someone is accusing you of being the problem, it’s often their shame speaking so don’t buy into it. I also learned that if everyone is offering you the same criticism, it’s time to drop the defenses, listen and learn!
Excuses and defensive behavior are often coping mechanisms we develop to avoid real issues. You can take responsibility for your thoughts and therefore take responsibility for your actions! How do you begin? Identify 3 areas of life where it is time to stop making excuses!
#2 – Identify Negative Cycles. Do you find yourself constantly repeating the same negative behaviors? Have you asked yourself why? Repetitive cycles are often the result of unresolved issues or judgments toward ourselves or others.
For example, you might say, “My mother was an alcoholic, I will never be like her!” Yet, you find yourself adopting her behaviors! Through forgiveness, you free yourself of pain, anger and judgments, and you shift your focus from yesterday’s hurt to today’s possibility!
You might ask, how do I forgive? We have a model for forgiveness—Christ, who lived a sinless life and chose to forgive those who sinned against Him. Accept His forgiveness and discover its great power! Ask yourself: Do I have repetitive negative behaviors that require forgiveness? Write them down and start forgiving today!
If you have any unforgiveness in your heart, or if you’ve been unable to forgive yourself, right now you can pray this with me: “Jesus I ask You to take the pain that is in my heart. Help me forgive the people who have violated me. Forgive me Lord for those whom I have violated. I ask You right now to forgive me and to cleanse me and to come into my heart to help my emotions, bring Your divine love to my heart today. Release me from my sin and restore my hope.”
If you prayed this prayer I want you to know your heart has been opened to the love of God, and He will be that healing salve that you need when you face tragedy and unforgiveness.
Go to my website today, www.LeslieMcNulty.com and look for our resources. You can find new hope for new life today and resources that will strengthen you on your course to recovery.
Today we continue with the last three steps toward discovering emotional forgiveness.
Step # 3 is to become ALTRUISTIC, or selfless, by giving the gift of forgiveness. Jesus Christ gave the greatest gift of forgiveness when He took our transgressions upon His body and died for us! He did nothing wrong, but God so loved us that He sent His Son to pay the price for our sin.
Christ’s words spoken on the cross ring out through eternity, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do.” Isn’t this ultimately the voice of unconditional forgiveness, and doesn’t this give us the power to forgive? Sometimes in order to offer the gift of forgiveness we must remember or value an instance when someone else forgave us.
Step #4 Once you make the decision to offer the gift of forgiveness, Worthington suggests COMMITTING TO PUBLIC FORGIVENESS. This can be done through writing in a journal, telling a friend, creating a certificate of forgiveness or even telling the individual that wronged you.
Step #5 is to HOLD ON TO FORGIVENESS. Psychologists say that forgiveness is not forgetting, but rather, forgiveness is a decision. Memories of the wrong incurred and the associated negative feelings will arise, but hold on to forgiveness! Remind yourself that you made a decision to forgive!
Scripture: Luke 23:34
Perhaps you can think of someone that you have wronged? Or perhaps someone has wronged you? If you have not allowed yourself to forgive you may be affecting your health! Are you an angry person? Have you considered the negative impact anger has on your health? According to Johns Hopkins Medicine, when you’re chronically angry you’re in a fight-or-flight mode—which can have effects on blood pressure and heart rate.
Forgiveness can get you out of the anger mode and eliminate harmful toxins that may be damaging your body. When you learn to forgive, your heart will thank you—because forgiveness has been shown to lower blood pressure. A 2011 study of married couples in the Journal of Personal Relationships, showed that when the victim in the situation forgave the other person, both experienced a decrease in blood pressure.
